Alaska Bush Company—Your Best Story

Let’s keep it clean, but what’s your best story from this place? And how important do you consider a stop at this joint to be when you’re on a layover, so to speak, in Anchorage, waiting for a flight out to the Bay or beyond?

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2 Responses to Alaska Bush Company—Your Best Story

  1. unknown says:

    I was in my last week of guiding at a very well-known lodge in the Iliamna region of Alaska. After having a few beers with the lodge’s new arrivals, I immediately hit it off with two brother in laws(in their 30′s) who were there on their father in laws dime. I quickly found out that the fishing was the least of their concern. Smoking, drinking and trying to sample a few of young female employees were much higher on their to do list. Luckily we managed to get some pretty good fishing in regardless.

    Our third day on the water was a good one. A lot of big rainbows on the Copper, despite both of them being belligerent most of the day. A few long naps draped over the raft did these guys good and gave me time to put a bend in a rod myself. By the time we got back to the lodge theses guys had a pretty good buzz going already.

    Once back I decided to join in on the fun. The only thing that disrupted the flow of beer into our systems were the shots of petron tequila. Day turned into night; dinner was had, cards were played, stories were told, waitresses were hit on and the overall level of ruckus continued to escalate as other guides joined in on the festivities. Some of the other guests partook in on the fun and others looked on in distain, one of which was the loafer wearing, pleated khaki pant wearing father in law.

    As the clock passed midnight it was again just the three of us, to be honest I was fading fast. These guys were partying like rockstars after snorting a few lines of blow. This is where the harmless fun turned into complete acts of stupidity.

    Random tourist #1 excused himself for a minute and went back to grab something.(I later found out he had made a stop at one of the female workers rooms also) Random tourist #1 shows back up at the common room with a Glock 9mm. I quickly turned from party liaison to sober lodge employee and strongly urged RT#1 to not go outside and fire that thing. Unfortunately, RT#2 thought it would be a stellar idea to go down to the shores of the lake and pop a few rounds off. So they did.

    As shots were fired, one after one until the clip was emptied – lights came on throughout the lodge and around the Lake as the echo of gunshots rang loud throughout the calm alaskan night. The manager quickly came to the “scene” and quickly took control of the situation, first and foremost gaining possession of the firearm. After chewing RT #1 and #2′s ass, along with myself for being guilty by association everyone was sent to bed.

    I was awaken from the guide shack at 6:30 am by one pissed off lodge manager and summoned to the managers office immediately. When i arrived, the situation was grim. The father in law and two brother in laws had already arrived. As the manager read us the riot act, and went through the list of discretions committed by RT#1 and #2, that included alcohol, drugs, guns and fraternizing with the help, the father in law grew more deeply angered, embarrassed and ashamed. The lodge manager refused to let the brother in laws stay and threw them out of the lodge, telling them that the next flight out of Iliamna left in an hour and they better be on it. After getting my ass chewed thoroughly and it being the end of the season anyways, I said “fuck it” and left with them to see what other trouble we could get into. Hell it had been four months since I had seen civilization.

    We arrived in Anchorage and checked into one of the nicest hotels in town.(The brother in laws had a bunch of cash to their names also) After sleeping off the hangover from the night before and spending considerable time begging for forgiveness from their wives back home, the random tourists were ready to hit again. It was happy hour time after all.

    We hailed a cab in front of the hotel and RT#1 said take us to the Alaskan Bush Company, it was game on. On the way to the ABC RT#2 inquired with the cabby about getting sampling the local finest local talent. The cabbie responded with “i’ve got just the place and its on the way.” We pulled up to a small purple house along an Anchorage side street with all the shades drawn and a small open sign in the corner of the window. RT#2 proceeded to “head in” to take care of business while myself, RT#1 and the cabbie waited outside patiently.

    We finally arrived at the ABC and the random tourists quickly made their presence known buying rounds of shots, pounding beers and draping me in $20 bills that kept the girls busy and myself thoroughly entertained for hours while we watched the show on the main stage.

    After partying to the brink of exhaustion we went outside to get some air and wait for our new found cabbie friend to pick us up. As we waited for our cabbie, we got a few looks from two young, good looking and of course complete trashy broads in a car parked outside. A short verbal exchange took place between my drunk random tourists friends and the friendly local talent. Once the cabbie arrived RT#2 yelled over to them “follow us,” which of course they did being professionals of course. RT#2 told the cabbie to head to the hotel.

    After arriving at the hotel we walked over to the girls and RT#2 said “how much.” RT#2 said “here’s four hundred bucks meet these two guys in room 246.” Of course, these two girls were for myself and RT#1, since he had already had his fun on the way to the ABC, round two was not necessary.

    After some time we went down to the hotel lounge to have a night cap and meet RT#2.

    I awoke the next morning completely trashed and feeling like I had just been run over by a Mac truck from a full season of guiding in Alaska and 5 days with these guys. I snuck out of the hotel early that morning and took the first cab I could find to the airport, to head back to the lower 48. I realized my time in Alaska and my guide season had come to end; an end that could be perceived as an epic failure or an epic win depending on how you look at it.

    I never spoke to those guys ever again, but my memories of the Alaskan Bush Company will live on forever. A stop at the iconic ABC has been a must each time I have gone back since. The extracurricular activities before and after however have not been repeated.

    • Greg Thomas says:

      I really can’t compete with that one. Epic is the word to describe your adventure. But you knew that already. I do remember this—I was into my thirties and had never had a lap dance and some patron at the Bush Company said, “You are kidding me,” when I told him that. He bought me one and the girl called me a “virgin.” After that the other girls showed up one after the other to “babtize” me. Memorable, but I haven’t been back there since, nor have I had more of the same anywhere else. Fun memories, though.

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